Anxious, frustrated, and appalled. Relieved, hopeful, and excited. I have felt all of these in the past weeks. The pandemic creeps closer into my circle of colleagues. Relationships struggle for lack of face to face connection. Safety vanishes. Leaders disappoint. Yet medical breakthroughs encourage. Change brings hope. Surprisingly encouragement comes through learning that I am called, loved, and kept. Sounds lovely, but what does it mean?